... I've been struggling for several months since I returned from the Himalayas ...
... I've lacked true inspiration, I've felt lost, adrift, even a bit solemn ... and for those who know me that almost seems impossible ... I mean I live on the sunny side of life 24/7/365 ... but there I was, my spiritual tank on empty
... in my mind, there was no "topping" the summit of an 8,000m peak, something I never dreamed possible! But what do you do when the seemingly impossible turns out to be possible? ... have you ever had this feeling? it's really strange ... and I'm not a fan of it, at all.
... amidst this melancholy and aimlessness, I decided that even without the dream of my next BIG adventure on my calendar yet, I would re-focus on my fitness, try to be kinder to myself, and let inspiration find me ... within 6 weeks I was hitting new PRs in the gym for strength that I hadn't seen since my 20s ... my attitude started to adjust, thoughts became clearer and I started feeling inspired again ... but for what?
... and that's why the mountain in my LinkedIn banner changed again, because I started thinking differently about my definition of an "impossible challenge" ... I started thinking instead about my greatest fears ... and decided to use my fitness and climbing skills to conquer one gigantic mental and physical fear ...
... the fear of EXPOSURE - that fear of hanging on a vertical rock face where there is nothing under your feet but thousands of feet of air ... I've feared that as long as I can remember, and I fear it today even after a decade of climbing, and I have consciously avoided climbs where there is any extended exposure. Fact!
... so I called my climbing partner recently and said 3 words - Swiss Triple Crown ... he feigned shock, and then said 'FUCK NO' ... and as soon as he did, we both knew we were IN!
... it took me 5 months to find my way back to ME after Manaslu ... and I'm glad I'm back, ready to be a little more kind and patient with myself, but also ready to kick down some doors - whatever and wherever those doors are! Got some doors YOU want to kick down this year? Let's kick them down together!
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